Believing
Believing is ... the key
And i sometimes do it
... in a theoretical way
But when it comes ... to the real life
I just lose myself
Can’t see the real path
The one ... that i should follow
... for real
And i continue pretending
... that i believe
But it’s all a balance of contradictory beliefs That i can and i can’t
The journey continues ... in such a silly way And i still daily promise to myself
.... that i will make a change
But the change ... just never comes
... cause i simple can’t really believe
... in the beauty of life
And in ... myself
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
27
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
Soul goal ...
Pairing of soul ...
that built entirely in of
attentiveness ...
Understand melancholy
fluently ...
that can read deep ,deep
anguish from
Eyes ...
From heart ...
that emerged
from out of suffering ...
that flows of
Grace ....
Soothe ...
fullness ...
in all directions ...
Arij Emaan
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
28
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
I’ve become a ruin
A ... spiritual ruin
I use to be different
But i forgot how ... i was
I close my eyes ... one more time And i see myself again
That positive version of myself
Then ... i wonder
Why did i became a ruin?!
Who robbed .... my spiritual side?!
Why did i let them .... do that to me?!
Well ... i’ve been naive
I liked them
I loved them
I trusted them
... and i’ve been robbed ... by them.
But ... maybe the time will give me
... one more chance
To rebecome who i used to be
... and also loved to be
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
29
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
I opened my heart
To too many people
They defined me ...
in so, so many ways
But they forget to
... understand me.
Even the loved ones
Lost the meaning of our connections Not realizing we are here ... together ... to help each other
Defining was more important
... also judging
And we lost the connection
So many times ... till
The connection itself
... became useless
Today ... i still like them
And also miss all those people
... but we are in totally different worlds Should be useless to even think Of redefining our relationships
The time ... is gone
And we already followed paths that goes In totally different directions
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
30
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
What love is about?!
Of course to remind us
... that we carry
A soul inside of us
But i always forget it
And i dislike even hearing
The word ... love
In fact ... i hate that meaning
And i am afraid of not feeling it again
Cause all what i know is that
It’s an amazing ... illusion
And i’ve always been in love
With the illusions
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
31
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
The prince … and the pauper
One was a prince
One was a pauper
But they both chased
For beautiful illusions
The ones that could make them
One more time
To feel ... alive.
And it all became
... a chain reaction
Believing it’s real
Loving all those feelings
Tasting the life itself
But all ending all the time
... with disappointment
Facing all those illusions
They became equal in front of the Universe The prince was looking like a pauper And the pauper believed so many times
... that he’s the prince
They totally forgot
... that it’s all an illusion
Even the concept that defined them
...so well ... prince and ... pauper
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
32
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
I was watching her
She was so in love
I was admiring her
... a lot ... i should say
But i was smiling
... somehow ... behind her back And in fact i was laughing
... of me ... the one from the past Cause i was so in love ... same as she is today
But my illusion was revealed
My dreams ... spoiled
And ... I was so unhappy
Until i met ... her
My dear friend ... the one
That is so in love
And i continue smiling
Cause i remember of ... me
And the beautiful illusion
... of being in love
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
33
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
It was all looking
... so damm real
And i believed so, so much
In that illusory story
Illusory became real
But i knew that all that we define
... as real ... is just illusory
I continued for so long
Until awakening appeared
As the final destination
And i disliked it so, so much
Seeing that all
... was just an amazing ... pathless path Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
34
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
I am losing my time
I am just thinking
... thinking at her
... and maybe at the whole meaning It was all an illusion But i loved it
I close my eyes and see her again
I open my eyes and see her again
But no ... no ... no
Don’t want to see her for real
... cause am afraid of her powers She is ... so beautiful And i love her so much
... cause she always was
The perfect ... illusion
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
35
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
My journey
I have my journey
Exploring so many paths of life
But wherever i choose to go
It all looks
... as a pathless path
I look at them ... all the ones around me
Not understanding this concept
Seeing them how they define me
... in such a silly way
Being so ignorants
Believing that all what
... looks real ... is actually real
I try to open their eyes
But ... is useless
Cause there are not so many things To do for them
They are asleep ... in a spiritual way But i still wonder
Why do they enjoy the journey of life
And i am not capable of doing it?!
It’s quite a ... mystery
But i continue my journey
And they do the same
Even if all the paths we follow
Always prove to be ... just pathless paths
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
36
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
Good morning my dear
Close your eyes
Connect to yourself
Look at all you see in there
And give me all the details
Write me ... that beautiful poem
The one that defines the best
... your beautiful inner self
Let’s show to the world
What love is ... about
Describe me your soul
... just one more time
Cause i love
To hear that ... beautiful poem
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
37
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
The time
Maybe there is ... no time
Or ... i simple dislike it exists
And still ... i need to accept the concept
It’s part of my life
But i ignore it
I know one day it will ... end
And i ignore that too
I could enjoy it
But ... no
I am not doing it
I simple ... don’t know how to do it
So ... i just lose the time
Focusing on the nonsense
Ignoring ... all what i should really do
... for real
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
38
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
Disappearance ......
Something had disappeared for me......
Need to reappear .....
Need to retrace ....
Need to find.....
To find a self....True self....
To find a true self.....
Self that is whole....
That is enough....
who that contained my whole universe
with in...........
Arij Emaan
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
39
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
She was like …. the horizon line
Yes .... i was searching that
Since i remember of the first ... myself But it was always
... like touching the horizon line I thought i will do it
.... and i was so damm close
But still ... i never succeeded it
Then i was looking for someone to help me And it took me years for that
I found her ... and i felt alive again
But .... she was ... same as the horizon line
All i wanted was to be happy
To have a great vibe ... all the time
.... and i lost all those chances.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
40
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
My soul is crank....
On bottom of lose....
Need to settle .....
Need to pause.....
Need to meet.....
Need to talk .....
Need to charge .....
Need to exhilaration of inner growth......
Need to find sweetness
of life.......
Need to beat.....
To beat my own drummer ......
Need to backup.....
Arij Emaan
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
41
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
The nonsense
It all looks as a nonsense
... but it’s my life
And i asked myself so many times
Why i see this ... nonsense?!
Well ... it’s all part of myself
I like it ... or not
But i accepted it
Cause there is nothing i could change
... and still
Everyday i am wondering of its meaning
... and no answer is coming
So ... i assume i just need
To continue my ... nonsense journey
Mayne in the end ... everything will make sense
And the secret will be revealed
But too bad cause now
I am not capable of seeing
... any message at all
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
42
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
Yess....
Connections with yourself are highly worthy.....
Our thinking ,our thoughts always dye our
Soul......
Our character......
Without thoughts man is just contained a boney structure cover by meat
Arij Emaan
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
43
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
Wondering
We failed
Yes .... we failed so many times
But i was wondering
If we can try it .... just one more time
We tought it’s an ... illusion
But it was too beautiful
To believe ... it’s all real
I know ...
Maybe there is nothing more to be done
Except closing our eyes
And live one more time ...
Those amazing moments
It will be like creating
... an illusion for feeling again ... the illusion But ... i want to feel it for real Just one more time
And feel alive ... even if it going to be The last time
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
44
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
We are full of
Oppositions.....oppositions that within us....
We can overcome by just to....
accommodate
the treason,
and opposition within us...
Arij Emaan
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
45
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
It was so damm beautiful
Yes ... the life itself
Then i became dogmatic again
And i forgot everything
... about the beauty of life
But ... i want to taste from that beauty
... one more time
I know it was all an illusion
But what can i do?!
... i just love those memories
From that weird story
Today i feel the balance again
... the one from my soul
Between being again ... wild
... but also dogmatic
And i wonder if i would dare
... at least one more time
To feel ... alive again
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
46
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
I'm free thinker....
I'm free Concentrator .....
I'm free sightseinger .....
I'm free observer.....
I'm free evaluator .....
I'm free curer of souls....
I'm free lover......
I'm free appreciator.....
Arij Emaan
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
47
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
I was exploring my feelings And there were so many things ...that i just disliked
But i could not ... erase all what i felt
And i started to wonder
Why my soul looks that way
I could simple decide to be happy But ... i felt so ... lost
That i could not find my path to happiness
And i continued my life
Pretending i search for that path
For so many, many years in the row
But until when?!
When i will stop pretending?!
Isn’t it too late already?!
Well .... my feelings were always
... whispering me that
But i was not listening to them
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
48
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
Sometimes … the nature makes my heart and mind pause.....
Makes me feel wonderful.....
I see things for hours....
think.....
concentrate ....
observe.....
Then
love.....
No matter, if it contained......
Uglier faces.....
Uglier sites....
Or ,
Beautiful faces ....
Beautiful sites ....
I just arrest in natural
Powers......
Arij Emaan
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru / Arij Emaan
49
THE ILLUSION
Her feelings & his desires. 2 souls … but one single thought
Wrong or perfect?!
Wrong place
Wrong partner
Wrong people around
In fact ... wrong life
But i wonder why all that?!
Maybe it’s all ... an illusion
So that i understand
The abstract messages ... of life And i always live with
... the unpleasant feeling
That i am ... in the wrong reality I know ...
I should just accept all around me And .... smile to those connections
But i am still chasing for that ... perfect life Which probably is also ... an illusion
So ... wrong and perfect ... is the same thing?!
Well ... i still ... don’t know
And maybe i’ll never know ... for real Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
