She felt happy again and ... alive.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
24
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
A person with very strong moral values, started a love affair ... but it was a change that reseted her vibe and we like it or not ... the Universe knows better what is good for us.
So ... even if you have a boring life and believe nothing can be changed in the script ... at the right time ... the Universe will take care of all the details.
You just need to know that sometimes the change can happen unexpectedly ...
but can also be amazing.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
25
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
Unfortunately at one point in life you will need to chose between having the CHANGE you dream so much about and the people you love most.
I recently had some issues with water in a basement ... so i had to understand better the principle of connected vessels.
I knew it from school, but i read it again for 100 times ... and suddenly i realized it is the same principle that can be applied in all our relationships we have with the others around us.
It’s kind of a law of influences and the impact others have on us.
And there is a nice saying ... “you are the people you surround yourself with”. You know ... communicating vessels are a set of containers containing a homogeneous fluid and connected sufficiently far below the top of the liquid: when the liquid settles, it balances out to the same level in all of the containers regardless of the shape and volume of the containers.
And the same ... happens with the people that you hang around with.
Somehow ... at one point the energies between people that interact a lot ... goes to the same level.
Make an experiment ... surround yourself with positive people and you will start to be positive most of the times ... but surround yourself with negative people and then pay attention at the influence they have on your life.
It says that the change appears when you are in the right environment ... but this environment it’s not the country, the city, the town or the little village where you live ... but the environment of energies.
For example if you read books written by great writers ... you can take a little bit of their energies ... and if you watch important personalities on tv, or listen them on youtube ... the influence is even bigger.
If you go to conferences, being also in the same environment with people having the same interests with you ... the influences are even much bigger.
Great speakers charge 10 times more if you want a seat in the front line. Why?!
Cause they know about the impact of their energies on you.
So ... pay a little bit of attention at all those things and at the impact all the people around you have on your life.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
26
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
Define the change you want to have in your life ... but be honest and define the influences that comes from the people around you ... even if you love them.
At one point you will need to chose between them and the change you want to happen in your life.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
27
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
The change always requires a new mental software ... but also a price to pay.
How easy can it be to update our minds?!
Well ... is not difficult to start reading books, watching motivational movies, understanding the world from many points of views ... but even when you do that ... the real change is not coming in the way you want it to happen.
You accept all the informations you read about ... and even in a dogmatic way ...
and still the path of your life is the same.
Is like you have a beautiful car in your garage, but you can’t find the key to use it.
You followed all the rules ... but no real result yet.
And you keep wondering why is not happening.
You accept everything ... except one thing ... that you are not ready for the change deep inside your soul.
You like the idea of change, you know all the mechanisms for getting it, but you can’t embrace it.
But why?! ... why?! ... why?!
You see ... in life everything has a price.
You pay the price ... and you get what you really want.
It’s just part of the process ... but you ignore that.
You want to look amazing, but still want to enjoy the pleasure of eating a big tasty chocolate everyday.
But have you ever thought that maybe it’s time to not eat for a week if you want to look in the way you want to look?!
The list of examples is huge and we should lose our time to mention them ... but we still have in the soul the desire of that change.
You will need to act with your mind, but also with your soul and make an agreement that you really want to follow that new path.
And then ... right away you understand that everything is only a decision. The decision to become the best version of yourself!
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
28
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
Change is the need to live also new chapters from the book of your life.
Had enough of living a boring life?!
But how can we define “boring” and what should be an “amazing life”?!
I wonder if you ever thought of the right balance between a “boring” and an “amazing” life?!
Not everybody could resign from the job that means 9 am to 5 pm, monday to friday.
On the other hand this “ugly” job provides the money for living a decent life, but also for other small pleasures like going in a vacation from time to time, go out with friends to a restaurant and do other things that we love to do. But ... not all of them.
And you have to pay the price of spending part of your life ... in an office that
looks for you ... like Alcatraz.
There is almost no way out.
I am still laughing when i think at the fact that one year and a half ago, after 21 years spent in the office, i decided to sell the office to get rid of it.
I could sell the company, but i needed it as a financial support for me, so i decided to sell the space where the office was.
For so many years clients came in there, but after selling it i saw that i could visit all of them or speak over the phone.
There are still few that insist to visit my office at that address, but i explain politely to them that my new office is at the best coffee shops from the center of the city.
After reading tens of books about change, i realized that at 75, if i would live that long, i would probably still be in from of my laptop on the desk from that beautiful office that i sold.
There was no way of going out of the “prison” ... than selling the “prison” ... and enjoy the money.
I am laughing of myself cause i see my primitive way of acting ... fighting me with me.
The one that stayed in the office for 21 years and believed that going to an office is an ok thing to do in life ... and the one that was believing that life is much
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
29
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
more than living as a “prisoner”.
I was believing that the time for living other chapters from my life had come. I was still continuing to work for my company, but many times that meant to speak from the phone ... and i could easily do that from a coffee shop ... from anywhere in the world.
You see ... the real change ... is getting the dream life you thought so much about, but the way it can happen can also mean a mix between old and new. Yeeesss ... sometimes it’s all kind of a ... fine tuning. Just think about it!!
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
30
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
Changing the scenario of your life for 2-3 days
... is only a simple illusion that you ... tried.
In the real life, i am renting houses.
In the illusory world, where my mind is all the time, i am a writer.
But sometimes, the real life inspires me for my writings.
Few days ago, a dear friend of mine wrote me on whatsapp at 5:30 am that he wants to break up with his wife and needs a house so that she could move in there right away.
At 6 am i was presenting him the house.
At 7 am she was already unpacking her things in the house i rented for them.
I was looking at the 2 of them and i was smiling ... but i did not said anything.
They both looked very seriously.
Everybody believed that they broke up, but i did not even bother to take their money or at least to sign a contract for renting.
I speak lots of things with my friend and i just told him ... “Why haven’t you thought to go in a vacation for few days?! I believe is even cheaper that making the move you’ve done today”.
Of course ... he replied that he is very seriously about this and he will not change his mind.
3 days later, he brought me the key to the house and asked me how much he needs to pay for those 3 days.
I started to laugh ... and nothing could stop myself from doing that.
My dear friend changed his face when i was starting to do that, but he knew that i had strong reasons to laugh.
You see ... so many times in life ... we stop smoking, stop drinking alcohol, stop eating so much ... but that “big change” takes only 2-3 days. Why?!
Because it’s not a huge determination.
And even if it looks like a huge one ... it’s only like a fire ... that stops very soon. What can we do?!
Is there kind of a “therapy” for that?!
Well ... i believe that at the right time ... everything will happen in the way it will need to happen.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
31
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
And even if it looks that you failed ... you need to see it as an experiment and remember that Edison failed in 1000 experiments before he invented the electric light bulb.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
32
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
Synchronizing the change with the partner
... an important thing to keep in mind.
You have the idea of a big change in your mind.
You plan it for a long time ... and you really, really want it to happen.
It’s almost an obsessive desire.
And in the end ... it’s your life and it’s your right to think about any new path that will make you feel satisfied.
But have you ever thought at the impact of change on your relationship?!
How everything will look like between you and your partner when your dream will become real?!
Sometimes change means ... moving to another city to become the CEO of a big company ... or become a motivational speaker and travel all around the world. But let’s think at the example of 2 simple workers from a factory, husband and wife ... what if one of them becomes the director over the department where they work?!
Theoretically they will have a better financial situation ... but will that change have an impact on their relationship?!
What if she is the one that becomes the director?!
How will he see that change?!
You see ... our desires can be a little bit contradictory with what the partner wants.
Imagine you want to go out to the mall all the time, go to coffee shops and restaurants, but the partner likes to go out in quite places ... in the nature.
And somehow if you want to be togheter you need to synchronize and find a path that you will follow togheter as a couple.
And the same ... with the change you want in such an obsessive way.
Talking with the partner ... letting that person know what you have in mind ... what will make you feel fulfilled and present the importance of that change for you, as a human being ... is probably the way you should do the things.
Synchronizing the change with the partner ... is a very, very important thing to keep in mind.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
33
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
Otherwise one day ... just after your dream becomes real ... you will understand that one of the prices you had to pay for getting your dream was losing that loved person.
... just think about ... what synchronizing means!
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
34
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
The Change ... it’s all about defining the illusory belief about what you cannot do
I believe that everything is about defining ... about what we can do ... or what we think that we can’t do.
There are many teenagers that keeps a diary with their love stories or with their thoughts from the daily life ... but later on they abandon this habit.
You see ... the diary is keeping all the statistics with all the actions done by that individual and the funny thing is that it can happen as a person that did a certain action today to believe half a year later that can’t do that thing anymore.
It’s a little bit illogical ... but in time, we have many moments when we lose the faith ... even on simple things.
It’s a balance of beliefs ... from “i can do it!” and “i can’t do it!”.
And unfortunately, on many ocasions we are in the world of “i can’t”, instead of saying “i can do it!” ... till the day when you will actually do it. Cause, in the end, it’s all about what you ... believe.
Henry Ford used to say ... “Whether you think you can or you can’t, either way you are right”.
You have lots of influences that come from the outside world ... and most of them come even from close friends or family members.
They define you in ... let’s say ... not in a motivational way ... and you believe them, even if you had the statistics that you did that in the past.
And then you amplify all those thoughts ... in a much negative direction, instead of defining the illusory belief about what you cannot do and try convincing yourself ... “i can do it! I can do it! I can do it!”.
Just keep in your mind the idea of defining the illusion of “i can’t!”.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
35
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
On the path of a big change, you might change even the path with a new path
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
24
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
A person with very strong moral values, started a love affair ... but it was a change that reseted her vibe and we like it or not ... the Universe knows better what is good for us.
So ... even if you have a boring life and believe nothing can be changed in the script ... at the right time ... the Universe will take care of all the details.
You just need to know that sometimes the change can happen unexpectedly ...
but can also be amazing.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
25
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
Unfortunately at one point in life you will need to chose between having the CHANGE you dream so much about and the people you love most.
I recently had some issues with water in a basement ... so i had to understand better the principle of connected vessels.
I knew it from school, but i read it again for 100 times ... and suddenly i realized it is the same principle that can be applied in all our relationships we have with the others around us.
It’s kind of a law of influences and the impact others have on us.
And there is a nice saying ... “you are the people you surround yourself with”. You know ... communicating vessels are a set of containers containing a homogeneous fluid and connected sufficiently far below the top of the liquid: when the liquid settles, it balances out to the same level in all of the containers regardless of the shape and volume of the containers.
And the same ... happens with the people that you hang around with.
Somehow ... at one point the energies between people that interact a lot ... goes to the same level.
Make an experiment ... surround yourself with positive people and you will start to be positive most of the times ... but surround yourself with negative people and then pay attention at the influence they have on your life.
It says that the change appears when you are in the right environment ... but this environment it’s not the country, the city, the town or the little village where you live ... but the environment of energies.
For example if you read books written by great writers ... you can take a little bit of their energies ... and if you watch important personalities on tv, or listen them on youtube ... the influence is even bigger.
If you go to conferences, being also in the same environment with people having the same interests with you ... the influences are even much bigger.
Great speakers charge 10 times more if you want a seat in the front line. Why?!
Cause they know about the impact of their energies on you.
So ... pay a little bit of attention at all those things and at the impact all the people around you have on your life.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
26
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
Define the change you want to have in your life ... but be honest and define the influences that comes from the people around you ... even if you love them.
At one point you will need to chose between them and the change you want to happen in your life.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
27
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
The change always requires a new mental software ... but also a price to pay.
How easy can it be to update our minds?!
Well ... is not difficult to start reading books, watching motivational movies, understanding the world from many points of views ... but even when you do that ... the real change is not coming in the way you want it to happen.
You accept all the informations you read about ... and even in a dogmatic way ...
and still the path of your life is the same.
Is like you have a beautiful car in your garage, but you can’t find the key to use it.
You followed all the rules ... but no real result yet.
And you keep wondering why is not happening.
You accept everything ... except one thing ... that you are not ready for the change deep inside your soul.
You like the idea of change, you know all the mechanisms for getting it, but you can’t embrace it.
But why?! ... why?! ... why?!
You see ... in life everything has a price.
You pay the price ... and you get what you really want.
It’s just part of the process ... but you ignore that.
You want to look amazing, but still want to enjoy the pleasure of eating a big tasty chocolate everyday.
But have you ever thought that maybe it’s time to not eat for a week if you want to look in the way you want to look?!
The list of examples is huge and we should lose our time to mention them ... but we still have in the soul the desire of that change.
You will need to act with your mind, but also with your soul and make an agreement that you really want to follow that new path.
And then ... right away you understand that everything is only a decision. The decision to become the best version of yourself!
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
28
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
Change is the need to live also new chapters from the book of your life.
Had enough of living a boring life?!
But how can we define “boring” and what should be an “amazing life”?!
I wonder if you ever thought of the right balance between a “boring” and an “amazing” life?!
Not everybody could resign from the job that means 9 am to 5 pm, monday to friday.
On the other hand this “ugly” job provides the money for living a decent life, but also for other small pleasures like going in a vacation from time to time, go out with friends to a restaurant and do other things that we love to do. But ... not all of them.
And you have to pay the price of spending part of your life ... in an office that
looks for you ... like Alcatraz.
There is almost no way out.
I am still laughing when i think at the fact that one year and a half ago, after 21 years spent in the office, i decided to sell the office to get rid of it.
I could sell the company, but i needed it as a financial support for me, so i decided to sell the space where the office was.
For so many years clients came in there, but after selling it i saw that i could visit all of them or speak over the phone.
There are still few that insist to visit my office at that address, but i explain politely to them that my new office is at the best coffee shops from the center of the city.
After reading tens of books about change, i realized that at 75, if i would live that long, i would probably still be in from of my laptop on the desk from that beautiful office that i sold.
There was no way of going out of the “prison” ... than selling the “prison” ... and enjoy the money.
I am laughing of myself cause i see my primitive way of acting ... fighting me with me.
The one that stayed in the office for 21 years and believed that going to an office is an ok thing to do in life ... and the one that was believing that life is much
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
29
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
more than living as a “prisoner”.
I was believing that the time for living other chapters from my life had come. I was still continuing to work for my company, but many times that meant to speak from the phone ... and i could easily do that from a coffee shop ... from anywhere in the world.
You see ... the real change ... is getting the dream life you thought so much about, but the way it can happen can also mean a mix between old and new. Yeeesss ... sometimes it’s all kind of a ... fine tuning. Just think about it!!
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
30
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
Changing the scenario of your life for 2-3 days
... is only a simple illusion that you ... tried.
In the real life, i am renting houses.
In the illusory world, where my mind is all the time, i am a writer.
But sometimes, the real life inspires me for my writings.
Few days ago, a dear friend of mine wrote me on whatsapp at 5:30 am that he wants to break up with his wife and needs a house so that she could move in there right away.
At 6 am i was presenting him the house.
At 7 am she was already unpacking her things in the house i rented for them.
I was looking at the 2 of them and i was smiling ... but i did not said anything.
They both looked very seriously.
Everybody believed that they broke up, but i did not even bother to take their money or at least to sign a contract for renting.
I speak lots of things with my friend and i just told him ... “Why haven’t you thought to go in a vacation for few days?! I believe is even cheaper that making the move you’ve done today”.
Of course ... he replied that he is very seriously about this and he will not change his mind.
3 days later, he brought me the key to the house and asked me how much he needs to pay for those 3 days.
I started to laugh ... and nothing could stop myself from doing that.
My dear friend changed his face when i was starting to do that, but he knew that i had strong reasons to laugh.
You see ... so many times in life ... we stop smoking, stop drinking alcohol, stop eating so much ... but that “big change” takes only 2-3 days. Why?!
Because it’s not a huge determination.
And even if it looks like a huge one ... it’s only like a fire ... that stops very soon. What can we do?!
Is there kind of a “therapy” for that?!
Well ... i believe that at the right time ... everything will happen in the way it will need to happen.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
31
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
And even if it looks that you failed ... you need to see it as an experiment and remember that Edison failed in 1000 experiments before he invented the electric light bulb.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
32
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
Synchronizing the change with the partner
... an important thing to keep in mind.
You have the idea of a big change in your mind.
You plan it for a long time ... and you really, really want it to happen.
It’s almost an obsessive desire.
And in the end ... it’s your life and it’s your right to think about any new path that will make you feel satisfied.
But have you ever thought at the impact of change on your relationship?!
How everything will look like between you and your partner when your dream will become real?!
Sometimes change means ... moving to another city to become the CEO of a big company ... or become a motivational speaker and travel all around the world. But let’s think at the example of 2 simple workers from a factory, husband and wife ... what if one of them becomes the director over the department where they work?!
Theoretically they will have a better financial situation ... but will that change have an impact on their relationship?!
What if she is the one that becomes the director?!
How will he see that change?!
You see ... our desires can be a little bit contradictory with what the partner wants.
Imagine you want to go out to the mall all the time, go to coffee shops and restaurants, but the partner likes to go out in quite places ... in the nature.
And somehow if you want to be togheter you need to synchronize and find a path that you will follow togheter as a couple.
And the same ... with the change you want in such an obsessive way.
Talking with the partner ... letting that person know what you have in mind ... what will make you feel fulfilled and present the importance of that change for you, as a human being ... is probably the way you should do the things.
Synchronizing the change with the partner ... is a very, very important thing to keep in mind.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
33
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
Otherwise one day ... just after your dream becomes real ... you will understand that one of the prices you had to pay for getting your dream was losing that loved person.
... just think about ... what synchronizing means!
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
34
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
The Change ... it’s all about defining the illusory belief about what you cannot do
I believe that everything is about defining ... about what we can do ... or what we think that we can’t do.
There are many teenagers that keeps a diary with their love stories or with their thoughts from the daily life ... but later on they abandon this habit.
You see ... the diary is keeping all the statistics with all the actions done by that individual and the funny thing is that it can happen as a person that did a certain action today to believe half a year later that can’t do that thing anymore.
It’s a little bit illogical ... but in time, we have many moments when we lose the faith ... even on simple things.
It’s a balance of beliefs ... from “i can do it!” and “i can’t do it!”.
And unfortunately, on many ocasions we are in the world of “i can’t”, instead of saying “i can do it!” ... till the day when you will actually do it. Cause, in the end, it’s all about what you ... believe.
Henry Ford used to say ... “Whether you think you can or you can’t, either way you are right”.
You have lots of influences that come from the outside world ... and most of them come even from close friends or family members.
They define you in ... let’s say ... not in a motivational way ... and you believe them, even if you had the statistics that you did that in the past.
And then you amplify all those thoughts ... in a much negative direction, instead of defining the illusory belief about what you cannot do and try convincing yourself ... “i can do it! I can do it! I can do it!”.
Just keep in your mind the idea of defining the illusion of “i can’t!”.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
35
THE ILLUSION OF CHANGE
Statistic shows that we only replace a reality with a similar one
On the path of a big change, you might change even the path with a new path
