Adrian G Dumitru
46
MY LIFE IN A PRISON WITH INVISIBLE WALLS
...still dreaming about freedom
Why am i here?! ... my existential question. Everything is already said and written
... but even if i studied a lot ... i still don’t understand anything at all.
What is the message behind the meaning of life?!
Why are we here?!
Does life has a purpose or is just a set of lessons and we only need to understand the messages behind those lessons?!
Well ... when all those questions appears in your mind ... you are in trouble.
You will see that everything is just an illusion and will not know what path to follow.
But maybe there is no path to follow.
Maybe you should just admire everything around and be happy you are in this life ... nothing more.
You see ... in the end the concept of illusion becomes only kind of a labyrinth where you are trapped in ... and can’t find any way out. You even believe you are in a prison ... but the prison has no walls ... cause it is only an illusion.
Our believes becomes the invisible walls.
And?!
What happens where you are in a prison?!
What could you do?!
Could you have a normal life?!
What means normal?!
The set of questions does not end ... and still can’t find the answer?! But you know why .. cause you look outside, instead of looking inside of you.
Adrian G Dumitru
47
MY LIFE IN A PRISON WITH INVISIBLE WALLS
...still dreaming about freedom
Meditate ... think what are those ... invisible walls ... and try to live a free life ... even if it looks like at one moment that you just can’t get out of the labyrinth.
Then ... at the right moment, you realize that the purpose of life ... is just to get out of this so called illusion ... which means to learn how to be free ... but it’s a different kind of freedom .. the real one ... difficult to be defined.
Practicing the non attachment ... non identifying you with anything you see around ... will be the answer.
Today ... there are many moments when i realize that ... everything is already said and written ... but even if i studied a lot ... i still don’t understand anything at all.
... and maybe you feel the same ... but at least you should not be so worry ... cause we are 2 now ... feeling the same.
Adrian G Dumitru
48
MY LIFE IN A PRISON WITH INVISIBLE WALLS
...still dreaming about freedom
Don’t run away from the things you totally dislike. You’ll find the answer in there ... and the answer
will let you continue your journey on the path of understanding what is life
When i started to write the book about the prison of our minds ... i came to a point when i started to dislike that i write about the subject.
I was trying to define in 100 ways this prison with invisible walls ... and i realized it was kind of a cocktail with dislike and pain. Even if i had a clear plan of writing few books this year ... i even thought of abandoning the project ... but in the end i continued and asked myself many days in a row why do i feel this.
Later on the answer came to me trough my intuition ... but did not liked what i saw.
It was the fact that i understood i am not a free person and even worst ... i had no idea about what freedom was.
I started to see that in fact i’ve been involved in so many things, created a artificial purpose, that looked so real.
All those things that i named ... important ... were in fact those invisible walls of the prison i lived in ... and i had no idea that i am actually the builder of my own prison.
I disliked even hearing the word ... prison.
It was kind of a illusory concept ... that looked so fucking real.
I felt like in a labyrinth ... and found no way out ... but then i got the answer again ... it was ... just stop everything i was doing and laugh and laugh and laugh again.
Adrian G Dumitru
49
MY LIFE IN A PRISON WITH INVISIBLE WALLS
...still dreaming about freedom
So ... could i do anything to brake the invisible walls?!
I remembered a story about Budha.
He was with his followers and one day he came at them to teach a new important lesson.
He had in his right hand a flower and was watching it for hours ... not saying a word.
Everybody was watching him ... having no clue about what is really going on ... except one of them that at the end came to Budha and said ... “I’ve reached the awakening and i was searching it in so many places even if it was under my nose.” I had to do the same.
I was not hoping to get the awakening state ... but still i wanted to feel free at least in some of the moments of my life.
The answer was simple ... spend my life more in the area of what i love to do ... and not in the area of what i had to do ... or at least keep the right balance between them.
But i am sure that this is too simple ... to apply the principle till the end of my life.
Coming back to the prison with the invisible walls will be only a matter of time.
Adrian G Dumitru
50
MY LIFE IN A PRISON WITH INVISIBLE WALLS
...still dreaming about freedom
One day ... the truth comes to you trough your
intuition ... and you still continue to let yourself used by them. Is it wrong?!
No ... just smile ... and let the Universe
... sends the message of the story to everyone.
There are many situations in life ... when you see that the truth is totally different than what you thought the situation is.
You could even believe that one person truly loves you ... but in fact behind that what you see as infinite love ... is just a interest and nothing more.
You realize ... you will only be used ... with everything that means ...
but you need to accept the truth and see the situation as a life lesson
for all the ones involved.
Should you stop?!
... or just continue ... and smile ... letting everything come by itself. The paradox is that sometimes we are not used by the people around us ... but by the Universe to send a message to all the ones involved into the story.
Maybe the word “used” is not the correct one ... but letting everything come by itself .. you become a karmic character for the others involved the story.
Continuing, even if you know the truth ... becomes a non sense ... but the things are the way they are ... for a clear reason ... difficult to understand.
Adrian G Dumitru
51
MY LIFE IN A PRISON WITH INVISIBLE WALLS
...still dreaming about freedom
Not reacting in a dogmatic way ... might create the model of a new
way of thinking and acting in life.
But you must be tough for that.
Not everyone can accept betrayal as being a life lesson ... and that we need to go over the borders of our thinking ... and see everything in a totally different perspective.
There will be always a message behind the message ... even for you ... cause you are also involved in the story.
So ... maybe is time to define the unseen walls of the cage where your thinking stays ... and redefine a new style ... a thinking without any limit at all.
Adrian G Dumitru
52
MY LIFE IN A PRISON WITH INVISIBLE WALLS
...still dreaming about freedom
Gossiping about myself
... a new way of living
The human being love gossiping.
It’s a real pleasure.
Even ... kind of a sport.
But something changed in the last years.
People realized that in an era of Mr Ego and Mrs Vanity ... losing the time speaking about the others is a nonsense.
Why should we spend time to talk about the others ... when we could describe and define us in front of other people.
Tell them... how good we are at everything we do, what beautiful cars we have, in what an amazing house we live in etc etc.
Everything is the description of the perfect life ... but the funny thing is that ... even not being an expert into psychology ... you could see right away that the characters of the story that you hear ... are not really happy.
Is kind of an artificial ... perfect life ... which in the end is still a non sense.
Today a guy with a fabulous Mercedes AMG came to me to rent a house.
I was with my old car.
The funny thing was that he knew me from years ago ... being for a short time a client of my company from that time.
I was even at his house at that time ... so i knew who he really is. He saw few houses .. and after he saw my complex of houses ... then he was watching to my car and then to his car.
Adrian G Dumitru
53
MY LIFE IN A PRISON WITH INVISIBLE WALLS
...still dreaming about freedom
He was explaining me how rich he was ... and did this years ago too when we worked togheter ... cause he was building now 24 houses .. and i was smiling ... and then he stoped, looked at his wife and said ... “I need to stop! This guy is 10 times richer than us and i tell him what i am doing.
He has that ugly car and me ... that fabulous car and still he is richer than us.
I need to stop! My God ... i need to stop doing this!”
Mrs Vanity and Mr Ego left disappointed, but before he left i was asking him a rhetorical question ...”Tell me one thing, how is it to feel rich?! What does it mean to be rich, because i never felt rich” Smiled and said ... “Have the greatest car in the world, show to the others that you are like a king, but i will buy a car as yours to test why you are doing this game of hiding you are a rich guy. It’s a cheap car anyway ... i will try it”.
So, a guy that acted as the king of the world ... having a new amazing car, thought for a second of getting out of his mental prison and at least try for a day the trick with an ugly old car.
Gossiping about us is a new way of living and you will see it
everywhere, but maybe it’s time to read again the story ... Prince and
Pauper ... written by Mark Twain.
It s an amazing story.
The prince was bored with his life ... hating everything he had ... and the pauper the same ... so they exchanged their lives.
So ... maybe is time to try something new .. go over the limiting believes we have ... forget about telling to the others how good we are ... in fact letting our Ego ... make the talking.
The meaning of life is not to be prince or pauper ... but taste every moment the beauty of being alive ... without spending the time to ... gossip ... about ourselves.
Adrian G Dumitru
54
MY LIFE IN A PRISON WITH INVISIBLE WALLS
...still dreaming about freedom
Sometimes the words look like useless ... but not reacting ... we just prove our weakness
In the real life ... said it few times ago ... i am not a writer and not even a philosopher, but kind of a businessman ... involved in the real estate.
It happened that i built a complex of houses in an area with good potential, for the level where i play in business ... but the infrastructure in there basically ... just sucks.
To install electricity into the complex i had to start the 3rd world war with the electricity company.
It was a fight like David and Goliath ... and i lost a huge amount of energy till i succeeded.
I wrote tens of emails to them ... just to become ... basically a client of them.
It was a total nonsense... and i could not believe it.
One year later i was asking the mayor to do something with the road that goes to our houses.
I asked it for 2 years in a row ... and nothing happened.
I got really angry.
I even had a fight with the vice mayor ... but everything the idiot thought was that i have a love affair with his mistress and is not about the road, but about the mistress.
Again a nonsense and every time i pronounce the word ...
nonsense ... i realize how limited we are as the way we think.
Adrian G Dumitru
55
MY LIFE IN A PRISON WITH INVISIBLE WALLS
...still dreaming about freedom
I started to talk with the neighbors about that issue, asking them to make also a complain to the mayor.
I even told them that i will write the complain if they are too lazy for that.
They totally disliked the fact that the road was looking like a country road from 100 or 200 years ago ... but they don’t even wanted to send an email.
In the beginning i wanted to start a war with the authorities ... then i realize i am loosing my time.
The mayor, the vice mayor and everyone from the City Hall were not caring about this issue even if more than 80-100 people were daily using that road.
It was no way of solving the issue.
Just write an email from time to time or whatsapp them ... remembering that even the romans ... 2000 years ago had better roads.
Even starting a war with them was useless.
I remember what Mother Teresa used to say ... “I was once asked why I don't participate in anti-war demonstrations. I said that I will never do that, but as soon as you have a pro-peace rally, I'll be there.”
But during his life time even Jesus was not understood ... while sending his messages ... so how should we hope that me ... as a simple citizen ... will send the right message with an email or whatsapp, just by using the power of words?!
Well ... today i still believe that one day, sooner or later, all the human beings will go the stage of awakening ... and we will not wait anymore ... not even for the mayor and his team.
... but not reacting ... at least by remembering them from time to time ... about Budha’s main philosophical believes ... we just prove our weakness.
Adrian G Dumitru
56
MY LIFE IN A PRISON WITH INVISIBLE WALLS
...still dreaming about freedom
Calming the devil from inside of you
... sometimes ... almost imposible
Truth be told we want to control most of the times all what is going on around us ... but we can’t even control ourselves.
We lose our temper ... then everything is amplified ... and instead of trying to calm down the situation ... we let the devil, that is inside of us ... to come out and destroy everything around.
It says ... we have a dark side and a beautiful side ... but we can’t keep the right balance when acting on the stage of life. Unfortunately ... there will be moments .. when we will need to show to the world that we are tough ... and the devil inside of us can play this role ... without understanding that probably the best thing to do in life is ... try to connect to people and make them understand through the energy we send them ... to care about what we are saying.
The dark side ... will alway try to find any reason ... by forcing situations ... just to get what the Ego wants.
But are them so important ... the illusory desires of the Ego?!
Why we pay them so much attention?!
Why we accept in one point ... that we will do anything to get what we want?!
