73
THE ILLUSION … OF BEING PART OF THE ILLUSION
philosophical essays
Telling and listening stories
probably an art … that we need to practice
Most probably to understand a little bit more than you can understand life from books of philosophy … you need to experience life or why not listen to the experiences other people are telling you … especially the old ones.
It might sound illusory …. but probably finding out what the
patterns are and how those patterns can be seen in our lives … telling and listening … might help a lot.
From time to time … i spend moments with a guy of 88 years old … and even if i ignored for a long period his stories … after a while i changed my attitude and started to pay attention to all his thoughts.
Wise, with a long experience of life … i see him today like a great philosopher.
88 years … means probably a lot, especially when you have the chance as life to let you experience many things.
And i smile remembering how he was telling me about visiting the whole Europe in the middle of 80’s … and i did not believed him, until one day when she showed me the passport with all those visas.
I thought he was lying … or he lost his mind telling me fantasies about Monte Carlo, Nisa, Saint Tropez … but again
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
74
THE ILLUSION … OF BEING PART OF THE ILLUSION philosophical essays
one day he brought some pictures showing me his trips from those beautiful times.
Whatever he was telling me … i was not believing him … but later on … i found out that all those stories were true.
So … i decided to stop thinking that my friend was a liar. And still?!
Why the hell i considered this guy a friend …. but in the same
time i was defining him as liar?!
A total nonsense.
Or maybe … an illusory total nonsense?!
Well … today i was seeing just an old guy … telling him about his memories which i believed that were fantasies … but …
I probably knew just the art of … telling stories … and had no idea about the art of listening stories and the huge importance of it.
Cause … yes … listening to wise people, which have a huge life experience … is important at least to know something about the paths of life … and what is most important to do and not to do for a beautiful life.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
75
THE ILLUSION … OF BEING PART OF THE ILLUSION
philosophical essays
We have so illusory images
but maybe we should not bother about that so much
A relative called me in the morning by mistake.
I was listening to him and i was smiling … seeing how friendly he was acting with me … telling me one million things … including compliments by my side.
But somehow, over the years … lots of people told me that this guy that was talking behind my back lots of ugly things about me.
In the beginning i was ignoring everything.
Later on …. I realized i have to ignore everything anyway …
cause the guy was just a person with a sick mind and behavior.
Standing near my side … he smiled all the time, like we were the best friends in the world … but behind my back he was acting like we are the worst enemies from the world. Well … quite a weird behavior.
But you see … the guy still remains part of my family … and can’t get rid of him.
Maybe … just avoid him a little bit.
And still … i was wondering … what if the guy actually saw my both sides?!
The beautiful and also my dark side?!
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
76
THE ILLUSION … OF BEING PART OF THE ILLUSION philosophical essays
What if this weird balance of contradictory affirmations about me … was true?!
Or maybe it was just an stupid behavior … defining me in an illusory way.
So … should i blame this guy?!
Well … he fucked some of my businesses defining me in a horrible way.
Or maybe he fucked illusory connections that i had with people that did not knew to connect to my soul … and it was all ok.
I had to get rid of those people anyway … so all what this guy was doing was in fact ok for me.
Hmm … so contradictory ideas in my mind, but … yes … it’s all a perspective … and maybe everything is going on … on the scene of life, happens for a reason … difficult to be understood … but in our benefit.
So …. maybe i should thank to this illusory friend of mine
that is somehow helping me get rid of … illusory connections.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
77
THE ILLUSION … OF BEING PART OF THE ILLUSION
philosophical essays
Truth be told we just look for an
illusory freedom … cause we like being prisoners
I was at that amazing coffee shop where i usually go. Suddenly Bill appears and sits at my table ordering 2 cappuccinos…. one for me and one for him. This time … Bill looked a little bit disappointed.
I’ve been surprised cause i used to know him as a happy person.
“What happened to you … my friend?!”
“Well … look what she wrote … and i had such a great connection with this amazing lady…”
I take his phone and read the whatsapp message load … “Good morning,
Even if your voice excites me a lot and you look amazing… the fact that you are not married makes me stop wishing be with you.
I dreamed of meeting a married man.
I don’t even want to bother to explain the reasons … but … this is very important for me … i am really happy i had the chance to meet you … but … this is the end of our short beautiful story …”
I smiled cause usually women don’t want to date with married men … but this case was totally different. Looked at Bill … and ironically say to him
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
78
THE ILLUSION … OF BEING PART OF THE ILLUSION philosophical essays
… “I suppose… i’m the right partner for this lady.
I am a prisoner in an unhappy marriage and she looks like me …. a lot.
And the funny thing is that we love staying in those prisons with invisible walls.
We speak about freedom, but it’s just an illusory one.
We don’t want freedom, cause we feel ok in our confort zone defined by our unhappy marriages.
We probably want just moments … of freedom.”
Bill was really unhappy, not understanding anything at all … but probably he is not familiar with the fact that many, many marriages are unhappy stories … and people prefer to stay as that for a life time.
Maria … this amazing lady Bill told me about … was just revealing our silly way of acting on the stage of life. Between happiness and unhappiness … we always choose the
wrong scenario. Many, many …. of us.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
79
THE ILLUSION … OF BEING PART OF THE ILLUSION
philosophical essays
There are moments in life when your thoughts don’t allow you
connect to … the real life … and enjoy it
She was sad … again.
We need to finish the new project about the illusion of life … about our perceptions … but … We stop all the time.
I believe …. she started to believe … the illusions are… real.
So … analyzing and defining life … something happened … and instead of redefining our thoughts … Arij … Well…
I still wonder myself what really happened … but can’t accept the idea that the illusions … all those thoughts from our minds … dominated my friend.
And suddenly … i realized it was happening to me also … but … why?!
Indeed … there were so many thoughts … and… Yes … we lost control.
We disconnected from reality … staying in that philosophical world … too much.
Or maybe indeed the title of the book …. “The illusion … of
being part of the illusion” …became the main scenario for our lives …
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
80
THE ILLUSION … OF BEING PART OF THE ILLUSION
philosophical essays
It’s better just to smile instead of being … indignant by the annoying situations offered by life.
If i would define myself into a honest way …. I would say that
at least 10% of my life was lost being indignant … of different
situations and circumstances.
I analyzed a lot everything.
Defined all happened in one million ways … and … Well … i was certainly felt like a victim.
Until one day … when i decided to change my perspective about all what happened in those episodes from my life. Being indignant … was almost looking like a hobby … but still not something good for myself.
But … i was doing it on and on and on.
Nothing stoped me … acting into this silly way.
Meditating more and more … but also having enough of this … i decided to re evaluate all.
And after years …. a trick came into my mind …
What if i should just smile in front of those situations?! What if i should redefine them from annoying to … illusory?! Should the theory that we live with the illusion that we live an illusion is real or false?!
Can it be defined as … a motivational trick … smiling in front of those situations?!
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
81
THE ILLUSION … OF BEING PART OF THE ILLUSION philosophical essays
Well … i simple had to decide if i continue my life … letting
certain situation to annoy me on and on and on into a karmic
way … or smile and redefine everything as illusory and …
being just a karmic test.
But it was all so abstract.
How the hell could i agree with this theory?!
Damn it … had no idea what is the best ….
Then life continued … and one day i had the power to define those situations as illusory … and days when … i just failed those tests.
But life … continued …
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
82
THE ILLUSION … OF BEING PART OF THE ILLUSION
philosophical essays
The bitch became a … witch … but her powers faded so much …
Truth be told … some people have a huge impact on our lives.
It’s like a dominant energy that is appearing from nowhere and stays in our life till we understand a certain message. But as you know …. every story has a beginning, the story itself and the end.
And when the story ends … many define it in such an ugly way … but …
Recently … my friend George called me … telling me his perceptions about a lady … defined not so long time ago … as the love story of his life.
Today … the same lady was named …. a bitch ….
metamorphosed into a witch.
I was smiling listening to my dear George.
I spoke with him many times and it’s really funny seeing so contradictory perceptions … about the same person.
On the other hand … the truth was that Samantha wrote to him … sending him a message from his dead father.
George did not had a good relationship with his father … and before he died … he did not knew to make peace with him. In the same way … George broke up with Samantha … but did not made peace with her either.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
83
THE ILLUSION … OF BEING PART OF THE ILLUSION philosophical essays
That illusory love of his life … became a bitch …. and then a
witch that sent him messages from the world of death. But when he finished telling me the whole story … George asks me … “Why the hell she did not bothered to tell me her thoughts and feelings about our dead love story and bothers me with my father that died so long time ago?!”
That lady used to have a huge impact on George, but today … not anymore.
He just hated her … and also the love story itself.
I felt him … a little bit … living with the illusory fear …. that
he was again into the illusion … but George was different today.
Her influence faded … a lot.
But … the ghosts … reaper … and also that fear of … illusions.
Father … dead by such a long time … was just a ghost. That lady … defined today as the illusion of his life … the same …
So … the question is … why the hell are we afraid about those
ghosts from our past?!
Why?!
… just why?!
It’s so damn illusory … and we could just ignore them …
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
84
THE ILLUSION … OF BEING PART OF THE ILLUSION
philosophical essays
Sometimes we create illusions ….
but end up by being part of those stories … believing the illusion is so damn real
It is funny cause each time i write a book about a certain subject … lots of stories about that subject are revealed to me.
Recently Briana … seeing that i write so much about illusions … wrote me asking for help.
Telling me her story … i realized how illusory life can be … and the meaning of karmic stories from our lives.
You see …. not being happy at home, near her husband that
was not rich enough for her standards … Briana finds a rich married man, that she already knew lots of things about. Knew for example that his wife was not carrying at all about him … so Briana started to tell him lots of beautiful lies … John loved all those beautiful words.
In fact it was like Briana was reading the lines from a script of the ideal love story … written by John. But you see … all was just a trick.
Briana wanted just a new husband … a very rich one and wanted to do absolutely everything to get him … not carrying at all about the moral aspects of the story.
The funny things is that telling him on and on and on how much she loved him …. she started to believe that their love
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
85
THE ILLUSION … OF BEING PART OF THE ILLUSION philosophical essays
story is real.
In fact she started to believe in that induced illusion … really believing in her illusory love for John.
At the end of the story, in a short moment of awakening … John realized it was all a lie … but Briana continued to believe she is in love with him.
She wrote me … hoping that … i can tell how she could find a
way out of that illusion.
I was just … smiling.
Probably John … was not believing her lies anymore …. but i
was laughing in front of such a story … understanding that inducing illusions … we could end up … being part of those illusions.
The way out?!
Well … analyzing and defining the real truth is probably the way out from such a story … but who knows …. maybe … in
the end Briana started to like her illusory love … ending up believing is … real.
Yes …. that is the story … with the lies that induce illusions …
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
86
THE ILLUSION … OF BEING PART OF THE ILLUSION
philosophical essays
The scenario had been written, but … nobody wanted to come on the scene and be part of that story
It happens i know so many people … that if i would write about all of them it will probably take an eternity.
Yes … some of the experiences i had with those people … touched my soul.
I smile remembering them.
I see the illusion of those moments … but were beautiful moments …. and i loved them.
At that time i had the illusory fear in my soul … that i am living an illusion … but today i feel no regret that things happened into the way they happened.
But i have regrets with the fact that i had moments when illusory scenarios were into my mind …. and i’ve spent to
