love … had the title … “Awakening can be obtained at the end
of a love story”.
And i … smile.
Today … I smile seeing … the people which are in love.
I smile … but i don’t tell them anything … unless they ask me
about …. the illusion of life.
But still …
For example i look at Marek.
He writes me from time to time, telling me about his life and … his own love stories.
And the funny thing is that Marek is explaining me all the time about his … new soul mate.
Somehow it looks like … every year … he has a new lady that becomes … the love of his life.
For me … listening the same story … on and on and on … it even became ridiculous … but i continue smiling.
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The interesting thing is that Marek is actually understanding my writings about the non sense and the illusion of the scene of life.
This is actually how we’ve got in contact … talking about deep philosophical subjects.
But still … Marek is balancing into his thoughts.
He has many moments when he believes that his love stories are real … but also moments when he realizes …. that’s all an
illusion …. and a disappointment of a love story can reveal
that.
Yesterday … talking to him again … i somehow felt him … a little bit unhappy.
But i also felt that … he is disappointed by the fact that the theories about the illusion of life … are real.
He started to explain to me that he saw his lady … looking in such a way into to the eyes of another man …. that he
realized that all what he believed about their relationship was actually … a lie.
But i stoped him and dared to ask …. “Marek! … my dear
friend! What if in fact we are capable of multiple relationship into the same time?!
Maybe she looked at him as to … a friend.”
“No Gabriel! It was unfortunately … a look of flirting!
I know what i saw …. and i’ve accepted that from the first
second.
It’s difficult to explain it … but for a short moment … i’ve become a simple spectator that was looking at the scene of my own life.
What i thought i had with her … and dared to define it as an real strong connection … believing we were soul mates … it
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was just a connection …. and nothing more.
I saw in her eyes … the moment of flirting … and the pleasure of connecting to my friend.
It was nothing between them and i knew it … but realizing that she can have in the same time the same connection as she had with me …. I finally understand what you meant …
saying that … awakening can be obtained at the end of a love story.
I did not even had a moment of … jealousy.
Maybe i could say …. disappointment … yes … cause i
believed in our connection and even that we were soul mates
but in the end realizing it was all an illusion … starting to become more a spectator of my own life … i realized the whole episode that was revealing that there is nothing special between me and her … was a blessing.
Unfortunately … a total disappointment … but a real spiritual and philosophical awakening.
It hurts … cause real truth … always hurts … but … “ I smiled … again.
I smiled because i knew that in front of the illusion there is nothing to do … but only smile.
I continued to listen to my friend.
I felt his disappointment … but also felt that i finally see another Marek …. one that understands …. the illusion of life. Yes … unfortunately the price of awakening is a profound disappointment … like Marek had now …
And still … maybe all happened … it was perfect …. cause that moment when we accept reality just as it is … the real secrets of life are revealed to us.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
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Testing fantasies … even if we don’t do them with the right persons …. might still be an interesting way of experiencing life
I was at the coffee shop from the city center, where i go most of the times.
In the other side … i saw my friend Brian …. in the company
of an amazing lady.
As usual i was pretending i was not seeing him … to let him act in whatever way he wanted to act. But … i was analyzing them from distance.
I could not hear anything they were talking about, but they were smiling and discussing lots of things.
The lady looked amazing … and i could swear that Brian already succeeded to conquer her.
One hour later … the lady left … Brian saw me and came to my table.
“Nice lady … my friend! She’s looking amazing … and you were looking like a great couple!”
Brian …. started to laugh … load.
Everyone in the coffee shop looked at him.
“Gabriel! I am your friend! I can’t believe that after writing
so many books … you still don’t know that sometimes things
are not what they look like.
She’s … just a friend.
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And i even believe that if i would be the last man from earth and she … the last woman from here …. we would still not decide to be together.
But we are sometimes …. friends and partners.
We are working together and today we’ve decided to stop to this coffee shop and enjoy a coffee together.
It’s a beautiful day …. and an amazing opportunity of
enjoying life.
We actually took the decision of testing how should be to go out together.
But like an … experiment.
We have totally different perspectives about life … and we even annoyed each other talking contradictory about few subjects … but we enjoyed it.
It was indeed the perfect day … to go out.
And the cappuccino … was amazing.
The sun ….
Even the people from the street looked happier today.
But … everything was a simple experience.
In fact … maybe … as i said before … an experiment, cause today i had no one to go out with … and she was probably in the same situation.”
I smiled listening to Brian.
It was … a nice theory … all what my friend was telling me about … and for a second i even thought i should try this trick too, cause i had lots of lady friends.
So maybe we should test life … and make more experiments like this one … even with things that are somehow related with our souls.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
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Most probably … our friends will allow us to do it … even if it might look that we abuse of them … but as long as everything goes into a natural way … it’s all ok.
So … yes … testing fantasies … even if we don’t do them with the right persons …. might still be an interesting way of experiencing life.
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
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Lies …. beautiful lies … we
need them so, so much
They were in bed …. making love.
In fact … it was more having sex … than making love … but
they enjoyed it anyway …. so they decided to stop analyzing the difference between the 2 concepts. The sexual act … was amazing.
She could not believe it … that a man could make her experience such sensations … but it was all … so, so real. He was amazed too … realizing that somehow … without realizing … he became … a sex machine.
And staying in bed together …. she suddenly realized that she could do something for him also.
You see … Karl … even if he was a great person … was not confident into himself.
He lost that confidence long, long time ago … or i could even say that most probably he never had it.
Briana was already connected to his soul.
Felt that … and started to whisper him … amazing words. Defined him as a prince …. but then realizing is not enough … redefined him … a king.
But even if many people like this type of compliments … Karl was not impressed of anything.
She could not believe … her words … finding all so, so illusory.
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Briana smiled …
All her life she met so, so many men that adored to listen to her … beautiful lies … but this weird …. Karl … was so, so different.
One day … she even called him … “my emperor” … but every time … he was just smiling.
He continued … being the sex machine she was chasing for so, so many years in a row … inducing amazing sensations to her … body.
She was keep trying to whisper him all sorts of beautiful lies
but … all those tricks used with all the other men from her life … did not had any result.
But Briana was such an experienced and smart lady … that she finally understood that defining him as her own “sex machine” … was enough.
And Karl …. loved that.
He enjoyed the fact that they had such an amazing connection together … and the real truth was that sex was revealing that … making all so, so obvious.
Or maybe it was all a lie.
There are so, so many perspectives about the same subject
that we don’t really know what is true or not …
But in the end we could say that there are things that we just love to hear, when someone is defining us … even if they are lies.
We simple adore … beautiful lies … whatever that means.
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If she’s calming that Devil from inside of you … means she’s the one
Many people are wondering how the hell we recognize a soul mate …. or at least the best partner that we could have. Is there any pattern that we could have to look for?!
Are we going to deeply feel that … or the blindness of being in love … might create us an illusory perspective about the real truth?!
I personally had that in mind also … but …
Today … i do believe that there is no absolute truth …. and
what today is perfect for us … the next day might have the same impact on our souls … but still … i do believe in the magic of the connection that we could have with a … soul mate.
And i am wondering also this question … by such a long, long time.
I started to not believe in patterns anymore … but i think still exists a way that reveals us the nature of that connection.
I smile remembering that a dear friend of mine …. an
classmate from middle school … told me one time:
“She is not the smarter girl i ever dated with.
She is not the prettiest one … either.
Not even while making love … is not so amazing how it was with other ladies from my past.
But you see … she is giving me … calmness.
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She’s actually calming that devil from inside of me … that force that ruined my life … by such a long, long time. Nobody offered me that … calmness … till now, but she does it ... so, so easy.
I feel amazing just being … around her.
You see … that calmness redefined my soul … and all my reactions from the stage of life.
And i’ve changed a lot since i am with her.
The connection i have with her … influenced me a lot … and i am not dominated by ugly energies … as i used to be.” I smile remembering … those words.
And i really loved his words … and this perspective about the perfect partner that we could have.
It’s a perspective that i did not thought about till my friend told me … but … i was already wondering how my life would look like … with such a person that would calm the devil from inside of me.
But … maybe at the right time … we all meet the right people…
Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
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Sometimes we don’t really know to define what we like at the loved person … but maybe it’s also about the attitude
A good way of understanding who we really are … and what we want … is to analyze and define … what we like.
And this idea could be applied also into a relationship. Defining the partner … especially the beautiful side of that person … it’s probably a … must.
Analyzing all the details … mainly the ones we love … and also pretending we don’t see the dark side of that person … we understand into the end …. what are the real expectations we have into a love story.
For example my friend Brian … sends me all the time tiktok movies with ladies dancing in front of the camera.
And you might think this is something … wrong. Analyzing Brian … many would believe that he has the fantasy of being a sultan … that is having lots of ladies around him … dancing and to make him … happy.
When i told to Maria … that is the most pro feminist lady i ever met in my life … about Brian … and showed her the movies from him …. she defined Brian as a jerk from the first second.
But you see … i know my friend well.
He loves women …. and he is not a jerk.
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Analyzing him more and more …. I start to believe that Brian
was searching not for a slave to dance for him whenever he wanted … but more for a lady with a certain type of attitude
in front of the connection with a man. But yes … it’s all a perspective ….
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“You often … when you kiss me … look nowhere … like you're flying somewhere.”
A friend of mine which is also kind of a philosopher … recently wrote me about his relationship with …. an amazing lady.
Years were passing and he lost so much time reading, writing
but also thinking … that he ended up … not being able to enjoy life anymore.
He became … probably same as me … the prisoner of his thoughts.
of millions of thoughts.
And i knew how all those thoughts are disconnecting us from …. reality … whatever that means.
On the stage of life … me and my dear friend looked … not being present at all.
This new lady …. was trying to connect him to the stage of
their life together … but unfortunately he could connect just to the … love story …. and nothing more.
Tim came actually to me … cause he was not really understanding … her words … “You often … when you kiss me … look nowhere … like you're flying somewhere.”
And the real question was … this was a positive or a negative remark?!
She did not wanted to explain … her words.
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Me and Tim were analyzing a lot … trying to define the meaning of that … but ….
Well …. in the end … not really knowing what we should
